Are you dissatisfied with your weight? Are you feeling frustrated because you are trying so hard to lose weight and even when you do, the pounds seem to slip back on again? Do you feel you are in a losing battle, helpless to be the weight you want to be?

Well if you are, know that you are not alone. Many people have similar feelings and frustrations with the Battle of the Bulge. As a psychotherapist, I counseled many people with a variety of problems. One issue that often came up was weight control. Over the years, I have learned some important insights into the reasons why we have so much trouble being our desired weight.

To begin with, I discovered that there are two parts of us in our subconscious which are in a tug of war. We will call them the positive and the negative parts. The positive part pulls you in one direction as it says, I want to lose weight. While the negative part, also called the scared part, pulls you the opposite way, as it screams, Im afraid to lose weight!, and sabotages all your efforts.

As you can see, if you are not your desired weight, it is often because the negative part or scared part is in control. Therefore, you need to get in touch with and overcome your specific fears around weight loss so that the positive part can win the battle. The following are some negative decisions or fears that were uncovered in my clients unconscious that were keeping them from being their desired weight:

1. If Im slim and attractive, people will reject me. (Peers were jealous of her attractiveness as she developed around the age of twelve.)

2. Its not safe to be slim. (She was molested.)

3. If Im slim, I will attract another relationship and Im afraid to get hurt again. (She was hurt in a previous relationship so she built a wall of fat to protect herself.)

4. If Im slim, I will be sick. (She was very slim and sick when she was a child.)

5. If Im slim, I will be weak. (A bully attacked him when he was ten.)

6. Im afraid I wont have enough food later. (When he was a child, he was often hungry.)

7. I cant handle all the attention I get from men. (She was very attractive when she was slim.)

8. Im afraid that he will only want me for my body. (She felt she was not appreciated for her intelligence.)

9. Food means love and attention. (As a child she only experienced love and attention when she was fed.)
10. Im afraid to feel my feelings. (She stuffed her feelings, especially fear and anger.)
11. Im angry at my dad, mom or loving partner. (Ill show themthey want me to be slim.)
12. Im bad; I dont deserve to feel good. (She felt guilty and was punishing herself.)
13. Im afraid that Ill be attempted to have an affair. (She was unhappy in her marriage.)
14. I wouldnt know who I was if I was slim. (She was afraid of the unknown.)

After the clients overcame their fears of being their desired weight, they often said, This is the first time in my life that Im finding my weight loss program effortless. They realized that their unconscious negative part was quiet and was no longer fighting their willful efforts to be slim.

To summarize, if you dare to be slim, then overcome your fears. You really can be the person you want to be. You deserve to be that happy, healthy, attractive, slender person. Go for it!

(Excerpts from the booklet, e-book, and tape, Dare To Be Slim)

1997 by Helene Rothschild, M.S., M.A., MFT, Marriage, Family Therapist,speaker, and author. www.helenerothschild.com

Helene Rothschild

Helene Rothschild, MS, MA, MFT, Marriage, Family Therapist, is happy to announce that her newest book is now available. "ALL YOU NEED IS H A R T, Create Joy, Love and Abundance -- NOW!" A unique guide to Holistic And Rapid Transformation, is a "Manual For Life"!

Helene's mission is to help as many people as she can to?love themselves to peace? which she believes is the key to health, happiness and success, and the greatest contribution to world peace. She has touched millions of people internationally with her phone sessions, teleclasses, independent studies, classes, inspirational and self-help articles, books, e-books, MP3 audios, tapes, cards and posters.

Helene has also shared her unique ideas with hundreds of audiences and facilitated many self-help workshops. She hosted her own local radio and television shows and appeared numerous times in the media, including on the international Cable News Network (CNN).

In 2003, Helene moved to California. Since January 2005, she has been traveling internationally. She is grateful for the opportunities to serve many more people. "It is a joy to make a difference in peoples' lives -- to assist them to live in love and be healthy, happy, and successful", says Rothschild.

Helene was born in Brooklyn, New York, USA. She received a Bachelor and Masters Degree in Science in Health and Physical Education at Brooklyn College and taught at Lafayette High School for six years.

In 1976, she moved to California and earned a Master?s degree in Marriage, Family & Child Counseling at the University of Santa Clara, in Santa Clara, California. After Helene became licensed, she founded and directed the Institute for Creative Therapy, a non-profit educational counseling center. In addition to counseling clients, she trained and supervised other therapists in a process she developed, called Creative Therapy (now called HART: Holistic And Rapid Transformation).

Helene has committed her life to service. She has the courage to listen to and follow her intuition. In 1993, her inner wisdom motivated her to move to Sedona, Arizona. In 1997, she was the founder and CEO of Joyful Living, a non-profit educational organization. The mission is also to assist people to experience love and peace. Through Joyful Living, she has donated thousands of her educational materials to other non-profit organizations.